Hey, stranger! I'm Abbey, 20, and this is where I make the jokes that my Facebook friends can't handle. If you find yourself in need of company late at night or an itemized list of what makes you awesome, hit me up.
last year i was eating in a fancy, large restaurant when i began to hear a rumble and the distant sound of people chanting ‘potassium, potassium’ and suddenly hundreds of people dressed as bananas flood this restaurant chanting potassium over and over and we were trapped there for a very long time because the bananas would not leave and they were everywhere
i wasn’t joking